I survived step 1 of Patti's 12 month action plan for love, Dating Detox. I didn't expect one month on focusing on myself rather than dating (or trying to find a date) to be so trying, but it was.
I went through a gamut of emotions. It was really freeing to not worry about "taking care" of anyone but myself. On many levels, I feel like I got to re-discover the things that actually interest me (versus those things I have feigned interest in on behalf of the men in my life) and take steps to plan my future, husband or no.
But the road was also rocky. The loneliness was very acute. I realized that I self-medicated loneliness by thinking about future dates or browsing online dating sites. So during dating detox, I was left to sort it out on my own. That was good, but hard, and I don't think I "arrived" at self-actualization or anything like that, but it was good to see I could do it.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter of this process, but I also hope to hold onto the self-awareness and self-care I developed during this month.
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